Wednesday, April 20, 2005
Return of the EBF....
Wow! The EBF has emerged from her hole and made her presence known! I can hardly believe it. I guess if you are going to understand the end of the story I better give you the beginning... rewind 13 years...

I met EBF when she moved to my high school her senior year. This was a hard move for her as our high school was small and most of us had known each other since grade school. There were cliques and it was hard for her to find a group to fit in with. She had previously been a cheerleader, but had moved to our school too late to try out for the squad. She started hanging out with the skaters (not the skate boarders, the figure skaters... we had lots of those at our school) and from what I remember didn't like my cheerleadery self all that much at first. I don't remember how our friendship started exactly, but I know we became close friends VERY fast.

Through high school there ended up being five of us that were really good friends: Bullet (my truest friend in the WORLD), Cajun, Frogger, EBF and me. EBF was a year older than Cajun, Bullet and I and we have a year (in school years) on Frogger. Anyway... EBF graduated from high school and moved onto college. I went to see her frequently because the college parties were way better than any the high school kids were throwing. After a year (or was it a semester?) EBF dropped out of college and moved home, she went to community college for a while and then decided that college just wasn't her gig and that she was going to work. This didn't bother me in the least. We continued to go out dancing and drinking and had a great time doing it.... oh and did I tell you that the five of us were a group of nice looking ladies?

Soon it was time for me to leave for college and I picked a school 14 hours away from home. EBF came to see me for my birthday, I came home at Thanksgiving and Christmas and everything stayed hunky dorey. We had our fights, of course, usually (always) over boys but nothing earth shattering. I think it was my junior year of college that EBF started hanging out with Sundae, a girl from Frogger's graduating class. EBF's behavior never really changed, but mine did. I was settling down with my now husband, I was finishing up school and I was looking forward to entering the "real world" with all my ducks in a row. EBF was still hanging out at bars, having lots of casual sex and being the drama queen she is - she was also living with Sundae.

The spring I graduated from college EBF called to tell me she was preggers. I didn't find this surprising and tried to be as supportive as I could. I flew home to surprising her for her baby shower and was there the day after her son was born to meet him. Sundae was named baby EBF's God mother and Bullet and I were surpriseing and hurt. Three months after baby EBF was born I married my husband and EBF was the maid of honor. A year and a half later Bullet was married and EBF and I were both bridesmaids... the next October EBF announced that she was preggo again (different dad) and that she was getting married.

Bullet, Frogger and I were all bridesmaids in that wedding... her sister and Sundae were the other two. I think the night she got married our friendship ended. The three of us (Bullet, Frogger, and me) were completely ostracized from the rest of the group. It was as if she had invited us to join in the celebration because she felt she HAD to, not because she wanted to. The night was miserable... she was divorced before the baby was born.

The last time I saw EBF was between Thanksgiving and Christmas of 2001... she brought her husband, Singer, up "to see how a family can live on two incomes". Yes that is right she only came to see me to influence her husband to get a job... not to visit, not to let me see the cute little belly. To. Prove. A. Point. FUCK! I was extremely hurt and started to get fed up. In April (I don't even remember the date) her daughter was born and that was the last time we spoke. I called to congratulate her, to wish her well, and to tell her I would be in town for the weekend - if she wanted me to come over, give me a call at my parents house. She never called.

Anyway... that is my side of the long story. Bullet and Frogger and Cajun all have their own versions but the ending is the same. No one talks to her anymore. Until today.

Today Bullet received a card from EBF congratulating her on the recent birth of her son, and acknowledging the disappearance of their friendship. She closed it with mention of getting things back to the way they used to be and included her phone number. Bullet is confused and doesn't know what to do. She, like me, doesn't want the friendship back. She doesn't want to get hurt. I understand her predicament completely. How can she be gracious and still keep EBF at arms length?

I guess that was long winded, but without a bit of background you have nothing to base your opinion on and I NEED opinions.... not that anyone is reading this.


Post a Comment

<< Home